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2011年1月31日 星期一

Surrey woman is a victim of dating site scam

30 December 2010, updated at 13: 53 GMT police have warned residents in Surrey looking for love to be on your guard for dating site scams.

The warning follows an incident involving a woman Horley which corresponded with a man who stated that he was in the US Army.

The officials told the man convinced her up until your phone and then asked her to fill out forms of liberation and pay $ 300 in order for him to visit her.

The woman said that she couldn't pay the sum and was reduced to $ 100, although she did not pay the money.

SGT Simon Ward said: "this seems to be a well-established farce that has been used in other parts of the country.

"Was carefully planned and designed to create a relationship with this lady during a period of time to give it credibility.

"Our advice is never part with money to a person never met, no matter how convincing they sound."


View the original article here

Dating beautiful women over 40


As a Manager in a multinational is definitely insufficient to attract women. However, having a busy schedule and be on the road all the time not allowed me to date. In Add dding, after two years of struggle, divorce documents and child support issues, I must say it was not in patient so find someone new.

As time passed, I realized that spending my life as a workaholic is definitely not good. Therefore, I decided to take my chances with beautiful women over 40. Sure, I could go for younger women, but I'm looking for a relationship mature that would last long. I am not prepared to make a girl of 8 years and I'm looking for a woman with experience. This is why I started to surf the net, looking beautiful women over 40.

I was so surprised to find many beautiful women over 40 who are still thinking how adolescents. A friend of mine told me that the majority of women who spend time on dating sites is just looking for some fun, or talking beautiful women over 40 or teenage girls. Perhaps hat, but I was convinced that I could find my true love there.

I've had my share of disappointments. Perhaps, for most men, having a dinner, a walk in the Park and a "fast" is not a disappointment, but for me, it was definitely. I searched the net for over a year and I went to dozens of dates. Finally, I met Brenda on dating beautiful women over 40 sites. I can't say that you are the only, but we are on the third date now, and there is no sign that it could be just another girl in search of some fun.









10 things women find attractive in men


Is very simple. There are ten quality women find attractive in men. If you possess these ten quality, then you can bet that women will be coming later. Here they are:

1. the will to commit themselves to relationship a long life. Women are attracted to men who are not afraid to commit to relations 's long-term. .

2. a willingness to do whatever it takes to take care of a woman. Women want to feel protected and thrive when a man is stable and financially secure. They fall in love easily when they know that should not be running all borrowing a relationship in.

3. ability to work hard. A hardworking man is going to make sure he can give to his woman. This also means that he will be able to provide for a family, when it comes time for women to have children.

4. a natural ability to love and take care of children. Women are attracted to men who love children. They figure if you show love to children who are not also your, which will probably be a good father when you you.

5. Be polite in social situations is business. Women is hard to resist men who lead themselves well in social and business situations.

6. not being overly flirtatious. Women are not comfortable with men who are overly flirtatious. The less you're flirtatious with members of the opposite sex are more attractive.

7. Be generous. Gentlemen are few and far between. So when women find men kindness, they tend to want a relationship be with them.

8. A good problem solver. Women love men who are capable of struggling to find solutions to problems without complaining or excuses.

9. a good listener. Women love men who want to hear what they have to say. Many women feel that only men do not know how to listen to and easily forget what was said. So when women meet men with good listening skills, they get connected.

10. a good lover to bed. This is very important to have quality. If you're a nice guy and you don't know how to meet women in bed, you will have a hard time building a romantic relationship the long term with women.

So if you see a man dating a beautiful woman, then you know that he must have ten of the characteristics listed above. This guy is probably doing all the things that women find attractive in men.








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2011年1月30日 星期日

Seduction tips for men shy only-how to get beautiful women to seduce you


In this article I will share some seduction simple tips for men shy. The truth that most beautiful women (or pick up line Guides) don't say is that many of the worlds most exotic and demand women prefer men who are actually shy, sensitive and more emotional and more outrageous. You don't believe me? Just look at the actual investigations conducted by the women's magazine anywhere-when it comes to "buyers regrets" among married women around the globe, the quality of # 1 for that have long is sensitivity spouse! a With this in mind, let's look at how you can be more enticing in rapid fire turn around time, even if the natural inclination is quiet and private. Read about ...:-)

Ambiance is exceptionally important

Pure and simple, a beautiful woman want a seduction scene that is romantic, erotic and bright in its landscape. What does this mean for you? If you can set the scene for seduction, the setting will speak volumes for you-even when it is not necessary! (and most of these other guys just never do this right!)

She Wants to Share ....Let Her do it and Reap the rewards!

This is so important for beautiful women worldwide, yet, so few people are good. A woman is emotional intimacy to be a precursor to real physical arousal, and in my opinion, this is where many men out simply dropped the ball. A womans DEEPEST erotic desire is to be in demand and command ... and if she gives the opportunity to take center stage in the conversation, she will do the same thing when it comes to a bedroom to boot!

The secret is a woman who loves to be in control ... and a sexy, sensitive guy is talented, but smart enough to know that you give room to shine is the fastest way to sexy, sinful seduction as well ...:-)








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Women and law

The current vogue for equality as devised by Harriet Harman not only promotes anti-male propaganda, it is destabilising the female role in society.


Women no longer support their men intellectually. They scorn their ideas and opinions. They contradict traditional values and have imposed new domestic "house" rules on them. They have absorbed the power struggle in the workplace without considering the damage to themselves, their children and their families.


The traditional role of the male to be a modern day hunter gatherer has been slowly erased by modern society and women's lib. This has left men in a maze of lost values and intellectual vacuum.


As women's power to articulate to the finest degree has expanded, their ability to understand their own role in society and the family has diminished. While men used to have the support and wisdom of a woman at home after a hard days manual work, our new "equal" society means that a man returning home from work finds no stability. He often finds that the home is ruled by a woman just as exhausted as he is and often snared in her own neurosis. The ability therefore for a woman to support her man in a traditional sense has gone. He no longer has the benefit of her calming experience & wisdom. And she can no longer offer her support with his daily trials or help him work through his daily problems.


In fact it often appears that women have decided that they are better off alone than striving through the chore of male/female relationships. This lack of understanding not only hinders the ability of couples to work out their problems and learn from their mistakes. But completely ignores the duality of our existence and humanities ability for spiritual growth.


Favours For Goods
The solution to our current social/economic problems is not going to come from the political arena. It could be said that we should realign our political allegiances or progress to a more localised community which is more cohesive and willing to help others. But the most likely solution to our problems is a lot simpler than that.


The happiness we all seek is not in the material goods we have been educated to desire, but in the relationships we form between the sexes. The love and compassion of women can give us all the strength to form a bond of understanding which is insurmountable. We have been conned by our tax gathering barons to support their existence. They have used their power to corrupt and intimidate the population. They are the Industrial Politicians who have wreaked disaster on the planet and our economy.


We will have to fight for our rights in a new arena which will have painful consequences. To resolve the conflict between the sexes we have to get women to return to their roots as lovers of men and stop the materialistic drift of favours for goods. The sexual battle going on between men & women is confused by the variations between the generations. While the younger generation has suffered from a devalued or even eradicated the value of sexual intimacy, the older forty something's seem to have a barter/ sufferance attitude.


This is hardly relevant to our current society where unemployment is rife, money is debt and affluence is a deceit. Are the women of this nation going to suddenly abandon all the men who are unemployed, homeless and skint? Well yes.


Emotional Support
The barriers between the sexes has led to a divisive society with split gender values and digressing objectives.


The stress, anxiety and the daily pressures put on the modern family has turned marital relationships into a battle for survival. But it is the lack of emotional support within the marriage that actually causes the relationship to founder and break.The reason that some relationships can survive outside stresses is the ability of the couple to communicate the changes within their lives. Most men nowadays are self absorbed in work and the values and ethics of their work environment. They can quite easily lose the ability to identify with their home life and just use it as a base to work from.


Equally a woman who works can equally become self absorbed in work and the values and ethics of their work environment leading her to an inability to identify with their home life. When you add to this the confusion of social expectations and societies collective values you end up with fragmented relationships.


Down Time
This problem starts with time management.


There is never enough time and our society is not designed or willing to support the necessary down time for people to recover their sanity in this insane world. Even women who are used to shopping for recreation, pampering at health studios and pools do not usually share this with their men. Yet this is a necessary part of life for both sexes in our modern world. We are not slaves meant to strive our way through life. We are intelligent beings who should be able to design and live a life of our choice. Down time is one way of regaining person balance recharging our batteries and allowing ourselves to support each other emotionally.


The Perfect World
We now have a society which is split between the over employed and the unemployed. We have people who live in luxurious homes on their own while others are homeless. We have a materialistic consumer society which is driven to support an unsustainable economy. We have an industrial political system which is constructed to support these ideals. And a planet that we have abused recklessly for too long. We have a perfect world but no time to enjoy it.


Life is a journey
If life is a journey, you can travel freely, talk to people and get to your next destination.


Relationships, marriages and families often turn into a Cul de Sac where life is no longer a journey but a routine existence of repetitive drudgery. This is the materialistic dream. A better house, a better car, a newer kitchen. But all this affluence comes at a price and the price is a lifetime of debt. Your mortgage, insurances, loans, credit cards, taxes are all debts that keep you in debt. This is the trap sprung by our system of government in a western society. The workers support the establishment. But nowadays the establishment has got so big that the workers have an unrealistic tax burden. And the politicians are protecting an unsustainable system.


Emotional Intelligence
One of the biggest frauds perpetrated on male society is the fact that we are emotionally illiterate and that women are the source and foundation of emotional empathy in our lives.


Women are very good at networking and have built up a solid wall of hostility and indifference to the males in their lives.
This is solidly supported by their network of female friendships and work colleagues. The truth is that this is a myth which women have conveniently assimilated to keep themselves safe and cosseted from the alleged harshness of male society. The truth is that they are just as lost emotionally as their partners and their male associates. In fact they are even more unwilling to enter into the world of emotional literacy because while men will at least take the faltering first steps to form a loving relationships, women will turn a relationship into a continual test for the male to fail and never actually open up their inner deep emotional feelings. This leads to a denial of love and a reality check of status, compatibility and dominance.


The inability of both sexes to form relationships with strength and mutual respect has turned into a search for a partner who will fit in and not challenge or upset a person's personality. Given the choice the intelligent and beautiful will be ignored in preference to a personality that can be controlled, manipulated and handled with ease.


Money or Love
So the choice is money or love.


This was always a consideration for women when choosing potential spouses. But then later in life the choice re emerges and then with more insight women are beginning to realise that they have lived a life but felt little. And now that they have the time and the money to consider their future, money does not rate highly in the list of things to do. When the materialistic dreams of the consumer society have died it is time for women to reassess their role in society and decide whether to live their life for Money or for Love.


http://www.RealNewsUK.com


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2011年1月29日 星期六

How to impress beautiful women-Whatever You, don't show!


As a man, if you have any talent so I'm sure you absolutely love to show at all. Also, if you have a lot of money, a beautiful car and a great job, then I'm sure you love to talk about it. There is certainly no shame that, but when it comes to impress women who have just met, is not a good idea.

Sure, a lot of money and a great talent can be interesting for many girls, but if this is the reason why someone wants to be with you, then you better find a ' somebody '. If they are after your money, then you probably created a false impression without using your real personality, slow down cowboy there, because you may have made the worst mistake of your life.

If you're tactics for picking up women include showing your goods, then I am definitely going to rethink your plan if you ever report a true. Not only will the girls are wrong, but it's a little will reject those worth. I mean think about it: you really think that you might face only a beautiful woman which boasted beautiful things and still be successful?

In most cases simply refuse it because he knows that you're full of yourself, how many other guys out there. Try a different approach; impress a pretty girl with your personality that looks good and expensive possessions. Many girls are looking for men, which unlike the other and do not use their money to get laid.

Use this to your advantage and show them that you are truly unique in its own way. A lot of people out there are rich, but there is a small amount of people that are actually rich in personality. Think of it as you did before they were rich and act as one with the Add dding maturity and will impress any woman on the block.








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2011年1月19日 星期三

The personal experience of implementing the collage Photo Frames and the steps for you before the acquisition of This Gadget

The lightest instants of our life, captured forever photos, please call our smile. A single view of the manner in which they have an extremely happy.

Surely each of us shall relate to the different user's photos everywhere and always someone pays attention only to the most important events in life. But we are all United by one thing – the effort to preserve their photos, long what and how can more carefully, so that each time you view left in us a sense of joy and caused the smile on his face.

Let me ask – how often you can find the time to retain the old photos and you can see? Most of us have the time, and often does not have any kind of feeling in the monitoring of, say, a collection of photo album or folder on your computer. The album that you want to see all the photos, photo albums, with countless pictures, which must always choose the desired – not everyone exactly.

How this situation, I discovered by accident. Once I had seen on the wall photo frames a huge beautiful collages, in the style of a very sharp and extraordinary. After viewing the enthusiasm of such an instance of the snapshots photo collage I'm very constantly to create a photo collage.

According to my observation, collage photo frames now – the leader of the market in technology almost enhancements. Because of the wide range of your choice, it will be difficult, but the prices are competitive and affordable. More than just the acquisition of collage photo frames I still gives some of the things that I currently under the text.

On the other hand me a collage of photos-frames are not just tools for the conservation of photography, for me is more – the option to create this painting, a second life for years he lived a happy moment. With collage photo frames, you can only view the history of the event, but thematically to issue and to share with friends and guests, is simply a pointer to the wall.

A sufficiently wide range of collage picture frames that offer manufacturers, will be very difficult to find the most appropriate model for themselves. Under this option with the size of the photo collage frames as the outer and inner, very different from the standard of the individual to personal order. Dimensions can be very easily adaptable for a higher price.

Finally, I note that the picture collage frames – an excellent acquisitions in the House. The only point where I'd like to remind you-this is the careful selection of which will be based on the practicality and functionality of the object.

# 684

Tags: Dating topics


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Shoulder bags-notebook and Designer label equipment supply and Totes for women

The laptop's bags today consists of stylish designer sleeves, totes and laptop bags for women. On the Web, you can check the designer, the sleeve Ladies sex bags for men, women, and the bottom. Clear bags include a line of animal print, black, blue, Brown, flower, gray, green, ivory, and more. You can choose from Paisley, Oriental, polka dots, purple, metal, retro print and other colors online.

Leather Laptop bag is available in many styles and designs. Totes are appropriate to the size of the screen of the PC up to 17 inches. Types of sleeves and bags include Briefcase style, Messenger bags and sleeves. The material is usually made from wet or the skin.

17 bags, laptop consists of stylish print bags with padding to protect your computer. The sleeves are heavy and wet rubber. Students, business travellers, tourists, and other users will appreciate the designer bags made from the wet suit features to ensure the protection of the natural humidity, shock and scratch protection.

These styles are thin and comfortable design with outside pockets, zip. May include devices such as mobile phone, computer, iPod, MP3 players and other devices, you can go anywhere. Copies contain a wide range of Kites, animation, leopard, the decline of water, groovy proposals iBud and more.

Business people, who prefer a professional may as the MacBook Pro is the professional designer sleeves for 17-inch MacBook computer. The bags are made from thick wet rubber cushions protect MacBook your scratches, shock and moisture.

These bags are detachable padded shoulder strap with outside pockets, zip to the security of the device. Leopard print provide a sleek design that can be used as the Briefcase, backpack or tote bag.

Kenneth Cole reaction is triple the space of 12 cm in leather bags for women. Totes are highest when ZIP portfolio and your computer. In the case of the exterior skin of the rich features, top grain Nappa. The spacious triple room for storage.

Females have the space, the Centre of the organizer and padded pocket computer. Pocket zips. Some cases have handles of the style of a practical tote. The standard color is black. Women still select a range of colors, including green, tan, Brown and tan, brick, etc. Some things bags are round.

An instance of a wheeled leather from McKlein Willowbrook have removable wheels. Briefcase comes in several colors such as aqua blue, black, green, Orange, pink, red and sand. Bags have the system handle and wheels, next to the other functions, to think about it.

# 517

Tags: Dating topics


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Attract beautiful women-methods and techniques of secrets


The majority of men have enormous difficulties to understand the mind of a beautiful woman. Given that some men have a life of love, when questioned further success often have no idea why that is so. The ability to attract beautiful women should not be a dream or a fantasy for you. It is one thing learnt and need to know what to say and what to do to attract beautiful women. Naturally one would expect that if you were rich, famous and owned film star quality, then those features would explain the ability to attract beautiful women and in some cases this is what really works, as after all is Brad Pitt married a chick checkout Safeways? However, women often look beyond these qualities to find love, and in many cases they flock of men who have few intangibles evident. Men need to understand what flows through their minds when they encounter an attractive woman, and they also need to interpret what women are thinking and feeling at the same time so they can adjust the behavior to exploit the situation. If somehow you could discover how to develop these talents hidden insights and quality, then you would have incredible success attracting beautiful women.

Before examining the physical aspects, you must really want to be with a beautiful woman. You must have a deep desire sitting with a beautiful woman and almost before the event occurs that you need to display as meant by her over dinner. You have to know what you are going to say to you on the phone when you ask her out, and ultimately you need to know how you will handle, when she invites in its place. You must also be aware that there will be rejected too, so be prepared for it.

To build a relationship with a beautiful woman is here the prime objective, so that on this issue reliability is one of the most important one man can posses. All women pass through moments of mood swings, depression, health problems and in particular of extreme disappointment with other men. I'd estimate that more than 80% of women in their forties have had one and maybe two if not more tragic relationship with men in their lives. So these problems to act as a roadblock to you as a new boy on the scene. If you can empathise with these problems, then it will be the man who is there when you need you, and then there will be no difficulty in building a relationship with her.

Women love self certain men. Their men need to successfully manage and negotiate difficult situations calmly cool. Negotiate successfully these situations can give a man women authority shall respect and admire. When you lose your temper in difficult conditions, then you look as a flexible and, well, honestly, women don't like losers.

Together with the theme of self-reliance, women like men who can make them laugh. Maybe that goes along with the scenery of bad relationship whereby women as revoked outside their bad past experiences. Is a proven fact that you cannot have two contrasting experiences exist in your mind at once so when you're happy and laughing you can't be sad-this is a fact and women knows this, but don't laugh at his expense-that is a killer for sure.

Is clearly evident, but to draw beautiful woman you can not be boring. Beautiful women know they are beautiful and know that they have choices abundant everywhere man so if you're boring and sits in a dark corner then they will have not yet noticed. Beautiful women like to be around fun adventurous men. They are as unpredictability and as men who have the courage to take risks. They, as a sense of humor as well as the traditional ' Bad Boy ' and rebellious attitude, where a guy says what he means and, what he says. An adventurous element is a long way with a beautiful woman.

A sense of caution is essential. Remember what you say, his favorite foods, likes, dislikes, favorite activities, music, books etc. After all you don't build a relationship with a woman, when you portray totally opposing interests. But don't rush to his favorite restaurant for the first date, and then treat yourself to any interest declared in a shot. Schedule tasks to impress you slowly introducing gradually the temptations, hold back because you always need another trump card to play the next date of blow her away and then you can show her you really listened and cared about what he said the last date. Elastic to a night of surprise for yourself or for a weekend in Paris goes really well (trust me) because beautiful women love spontaneity, and if you play the right things, if you're cool and we do things at their own pace, rather than she then you really did. Also keep in mind that women love men who aren't afraid to be different, so be creative.

It is also obvious that the personal appearance is critical to attract beautiful women. You must be dressed to perfection and you have to watch strong attract beautiful women. Whereas on your first date she agreed to meet and then she went to the effort to make the same beautiful to attract you, so look sharp and dress to perfection. Wear shoes clean and Polish them if necessary. Women Note distance shoes and who will decide if you are accessible or not based on these aspects.








Steve Brown is an Internet Marketer, Business Manager and consultant who's passions include helping people, wine, sailing, flying airplanes, refined and constructions.

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How to attract women


2011年1月18日 星期二

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How to attract women beautiful-woman becomes a man who yearn to sleep with


A large percentage of men from all over the world who wish to have the most beautiful women, sexiest and hotter as girl there, but it is a pity that only a few of these men become successful. Some of these men is very difficult to meet these beautiful women and when they do, they always discouraged. These are the men who ask questions like "how to attract beautiful women, how to seduce a woman easily and correctly"

When it comes to approaching of beautiful women, you should know that these women are approached by a lot of guys who don't know how to play the game of dating and therefore they know how to refuse men.
A very effective way to begin a relationship with a beautiful woman is to make your car highly compelling and stop acting like one of these men meets every day. When you become irresistible for a woman, you will end up starting intercourse with her. Now the question every guy tried anywhere to get the answer is "keywords here". The experts of the dating game have found the answers to these complex issues and you're going to count yourself lucky to read this article. There are three simple and effective techniques, discoveries dating from these experts that always will success with beautiful women.

3 simple techniques on how to attract women beautiful

1. faith in yourself and skills: trust is key to attract women. Women love men who stay true to themselves and their skills. Trust is a huge intervention for women. Sometimes, this confidence comes naturally and sometimes it doesn't. If you do not have confidence in you, the only way to go about it is false until you get used to it. The point is to act increasingly confident around women and feel that construct within you.

2. the power to evoke laughter: If you really think you lack confidence in obtaining a beautiful woman, you could always say its funny things that you will laugh or put a smile on his face, telling his one of your best jokes. If they can make a woman laugh, then you're on your way to get into her arms.

3. love and care: women love to be cured. They find a man who loves and cares for their irresistible. Shower of a woman with love and care and you will be your in no time. These 3 techniques are simple and very effective for attracting beautiful women.








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Where to meet beautiful women-five entertainment venues to consider


Many men have the same idea when it comes to meet beautiful women. They flock to a local bar and disco in the hope that it will be filled with ladies and beautiful available. Granted is almost always possible to find some women really great in a bar, but when there are a bunch of other men single, competition is cut out for you. Recommend trying a new approach, when it comes to finding a woman big date. There are many places to meet women smart, interesting that you haven't thought of.

A library is one of the best places to meet women. Many women have a fondness for reading and visiting the library just to navigate. It is also easy to strike a conversation in a library. You can ask what do you think of some book or you may ask if you have any recommendations based on the section in which she is exploring. Even though it may not have thought of library in the past, when you are considering where to meet beautiful women, put it at the top of the list.

Cooking classes, cannot be a place that dont you think when it comes to meet beautiful women, but surprisingly is. many individual take cooking lessons, as a way to improve their culinary skills and also to the social aspect. Very often students are matched, so if you see a woman who catches the eye, maneuver yourself so they are closest to you. Kitchen can be great fun and sensual.

Dance has become the new "in" delay activity. There was this preconceived notion, for years, which if a man was interested in dance, he wasn't interested in women. That everything has changed and men and women are embracing the opportunity to learn this great art form. Many Community centres and professional dance studios offer these classes, the evenings and at weekends now. Subscribe to one and you not only improve the dance, but you can also meet a beautiful woman.

Contrary to popular belief a lot of men, women love sports. When are you thinking about where to meet beautiful women don't discount the local sports field. If your team is playing, grab a friend and instead of watching every game, see if you can find a woman cute to focus on. It's easy to find a conversation based on what is happening on the ground, ice or the judge. A big bonus is that you know right off the bat that she's interested in sports.

The Museum is another neglected place, where you can meet beautiful women. Many women love art and will visit the Museum only for an afternoon of relaxation. Current projections Brush so that you can actually hold a conversation with a woman who piques interest you.

When you are considering where to meet beautiful women, think beyond what you did in the past. Attractive Women are everywhere that is only a matter of getting at the same place that is for you.








Don't let your future with the woman I love of possibilities. If you are attracted to a certain woman and you want her to reciprocate such feelings, there are specific things you need to do. Don't risk losing its or missing your chance with you because you have no idea what to say or do. For more information about what they want, women men in their lives, including a way to make yourself irresistible to you, visit this Site useful!

In fact, you can control what a woman feels about you. Instead of you'll fall in love with the hope that now you discover how to guarantee that you can not imagine a future without you in it.


How to attract beautiful women-a simple guide on how to be irresistible to beautiful women


Beautiful women are everywhere. There are actually a lot of them around you, but you may be wondering how to get them to be attracted to her. Of course, you can find tips and ways to be more attractive for beautiful women, even if you don't have that Brad Pitt looks.

Because beautiful women are stunning, most men get intimidated by them. As well as attract beautiful women takes really a lot of courage and confidence to catch your interest. When you approach a beautiful woman, you have to feel that you are more interested in raising awareness of his and not only its appearance. It should show her that her beauty was intimidating. This is what trust is everything.

A beautiful woman, like any other woman, also loves challenges. And because there are a lot of men vying for his attention, it is also your challenge standout from all its other suitors. A typical man would try to seduce a woman beautiful giving and doing everything I like her. But this attitude cannot be interesting for you. Instead, you should show assertiveness when decisions. A decent man, not a puppet, is what really beautiful women find attractive.

The secret on how to attract women beautiful isn't having a face like those of celebrities. Surprisingly, women do not put more weight on the physical characteristics of men. Men with a strong personality and high self-esteem are more attractive to women. They are easily extinguished by men who are showing weakness and negative emotions. A weakness that shouldn't show a woman is fear of rejection.

But although beautiful women do not put more emphasis on the appearance of a man, I'm impressed with mysterious men appearing to them. Usually get their first impression of the personality of a man by the way that he wears clothes. What to wear and how you wear them says so much about your personality. And women are very particular about this. Besides the nice clothes, you got to have a pleasant smell as well. Of course, there is no further explanation needed for this.

Other useful ways on how to attract beautiful women are interesting and appear to be a good conversationalist. Women will never be boring as a man. So you have to look always interesting and inspiring in order to attract a beautiful woman. Most men end up problems when speaking with a beautiful woman. That is definitely a big no-no, because they are easily attracted to men who can lead to a conversation. Learn to say the right words at the right time.

Another tip on how to attract beautiful women is to give them a negative comment, but something that won't make you hate you, but may pique your interest. Giving them compliments is certainly not new to them more. Won't make them interested in you. What catch their attention is when you throw them a negative comment, or an opinion or suggestion maybe they haven't heard before. But careful in that way, otherwise you'll slap. A negative comment should not be hard, should be just something that you will react and continue to speak with you.








Carolyn Anderson has been writing about love and relationships and loves to share some advice for those who want to build great relationships. If you want to know some useful resources to discover how to attract women, check out From the love of women taking.

Another recommended resource is As to be irresistible to men, where you can find ideas to attract beautiful women and women who want to be always.


2011年1月17日 星期一

Secret Garden [VHS]

Secret Garden [VHS]From Wikipedia:
When tempestuous Mary Lennox, born in India to wealthy parents, is orphaned by a cholera epidemic, she is sent to live with her reclusive and embittered Uncle Archibald Craven and her ill-behaved, bedridden cousin Colin at their desolate and decaying estate known as Misselthwaite Manor. Dickon, the brother of one of the house maids, tells her of a garden secreted behind a hidden door in a vine-covered wall. When a raven unearths the key, the two enter and discover the garden is overgrown from neglect since Craven's wife died there in an accident. They decide to keep their discovery a secret, and begin to restore it to its original grandeur. Under the influence of the Secret Garden, Mary becomes less self-absorbed, Colin's health steadily improves, and Archibald's curmudgeonly personality fades away.

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Yoga Challenge 1 Poster

Yoga Challenge 1 PosterAn excellent resource for all practitioners, especially popular with followers of Bikram Choudhury and Tony Sanchez. This poster has all the postures in the Bikram series plus additions by his top student, Tony Sanchez, which add variety and depth. Each posture is clearly demonstrated by Tony and labeled with the English language name for each pose. The poster is enhanced by interesting graphics, Tony's tips for practice and quotes from yoga luminaries and other knowledgable sources.
The size is 22"x 32".
The companion video for this poster is the Yoga Challenge One Video.

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2011年1月16日 星期日

The Ultimate Online Dating Playbook for Men

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Joan Acocella: why people love the Stieg Larsson novels?

Have got American readers to buy more than 14 million copies, collectively, Stieg Larsson Millennium trilogy books — "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" (2008, American Edition), "The Girl who played with fire" (2009), and "the Girl who kicked hornet's nest (2010) — Administration at Knopf has decided that it would like them to buy some more. So, the company has issued a boxed set: three crime novels, plus a new book, "on the Stieg Larsson," containing the background materials on the late Swedish author. If you have been in a coma say, in the past two years and have not read the Millennium trilogy about a messianic crusading journalist Mikael Blomkvist, and a computer hacker, Lisbeth Salander, fighting right-wing forces in Sweden, set to ninety dollars, not a bad bargain. But if you decided to pass on your novels determination should not be shaken by this offer. As for "on the Stieg Larsson," calm. It is a little thing — 80-five pages — and nothing in this corrects the Millennium trilogy central mystery: why it is so popular.

Larsson, who was born in a village in northern Sweden in 1954, was an ardent oppositionsgrupperinger all his life. Nineteen-eighties so due to immigration, Sweden, as well as other countries, in a sharp increase in racism. Suddenly, there were neo-Nazis and Aryan leagues, and the parties involved was no longer the frenzied souls Mimeograph machines operate in basements but slippery characters in costumes, running for public office. In 1995, Larsson and some friends founded in Stockholm, a quarterly magazine, Expo, with the stated mission of security "democracy and freedom of expression by ... document the extremist and racist groups in society." The Expo was undisguisedly model for the Millennium, the journal Blomkvists home base in the trilogy.

Larsson's anti-authoritarian writings won him many enemies and Expo. Printers and distributors of the magazine had their Windows messed up. Larsson received death threats. He took the measures. He allowed any photographs. In restaurants, he and his companion, Eva Gabrielsson, sat so he could see one of the year, she is the second.

In spite of all this is said Larsson to have been a happy man, as the fine life he desired. He smoked three packs a day, lived on hamburgers and often worked around the clock. He consumed popular novels, in particular, crime fiction, of cartload. And then, in 2001, in a move that no one has been able to explain the satisfactory — and on which for a long time, he told almost none — he began to write crime fiction. Later, he said that he did it for fun. Or he said that it was for money — that the books will be his "pension fund". He wrote quickly, easily, and late in the evening. In 2003, he had the trilogy first volume, which in English is called "the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo." This is a fairly conventional detective Novel, except that the culprits are the Nazis and neo-Nazis and crimes are unusually cruel: incestuose rape (homo and exclusively) plus murder kind of most appalling. One victim is gagged with a sanitary napkin and stoned to death. Another is bound and placed with her face in a bed of dying EMBERS.

Larsson submitted the manuscript to Piratforlag, a Publisher with a strong line of crime novels. Editors who never opened the package. (They do not read manuscripts from the first time authors). Today almost one pities them. Publisher, accepted the Millennium trilogy — Norstedts Forlag, the other company Larsson contacted — has sold three and a half million copies of books.

Editing went slowly because Larsson was always overscheduled. "Stieg Larsson" contains a series of email exchange between him and his Norstedts editor, Eva Gedin. In them we find Gedin ask politely Larsson, but with increasing weight, to make room in his schedule to meet with her and hear her editorial suggestions. He responds to the unconscious, that he will do so, at the end. One afternoon, seven months after the contract was signed, he went to work at the Expo, found that the elevator was broken, climbed seven flights of stairs, had a heart attack and died. He was fifty.

Partly because Larsson was not Alive when the books were published, there have been surrounded the Millennium trilogy of a number of controversies, juiciest becomes the question of who should receive the assets of the books have earned. The most deserving recipient of the aid, which many people saw it, was Eva Gabrielsson, which was not only Larsson's companion three decades, but also, at various times, supported him, not to mention putting with the fact that he usually came home around midnight. Two of them never married, but. Larsson — and later Gabrielsson — said that this was a way to protect her; She would not run his risks. Years earlier, Larsson had written a will leaving his entire estate to the Communist Workers Party of his hometown, but was not a witness to and was therefore not valid. When the Swedes die intestate, everything will be assigned their kin — a strange law in a country where unregistered trade unions is almost the norm. In any case gone Vrian money to the two surviving members of his immediate family, his father and his brother.

These two men were not ignorant of the awkwardness of their position. They gave Gabrielsson Larsson, half of the apartment she shared with him. They also proposed to pay her $ 2.7 million, of a solution. She rejected this offer, at which point the relationship between the two parties grew uncomfortable. Gabrielsson told the press that Larsson had been excluded from his father and brother. The proposed, on the other hand, that it was psychologically disturbed. Gabrielsson The story was even more exciting when the news got to Gabrielsson had Vrian laptop, which, according to several sources (including her), contained more than half of a fourth novel, plus notes for the rest — in other words, enough material, so that another could finish it, and it could still be called a Stieg Larsson Roman. (Some by Vrian voting rights to say he had plans for ten novels, and had started fifth and fourth.) Have Gabrielsson really the portable computer? At one point she told the press that she had given it to the Expo. Elsewhere, she said, "no comment." Reports, we will find the answer when Gabrielssons memoir is released, next year. In the meantime, think a lot of people that she has been terribly violated. If you call up www.supporteva.com, you can make a contribution to her upkeep.


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Planning of work-life series begins

Meet Mia; Dan Dennehy

where to meet women

Image of Minneapolis Institute of Arts

Dan Dennehy
Senior photographer, head of the Visual resources
8 and counting in the MIA.

Describe something interesting or unusual on your work here:
I get to spend only private time in the dark setting through a lens to some of the great treasures of the world.

What was your first job:
After a brief stint as an altar boy, I received my first paid job picking things lace gathered between acts at a burlesque club in the Bronx (kind of like a match of tennis ball boys).

What is hanging on your walls?
Photos of friends, a few paintings by chainsaw by Todd Severson and a may Stevens Printing purchased year at MIA prints and drawings.

If you're not a photographer who would you?
There is nothing in the arts, except perhaps a ballet dancer.

Where you born in?
New York City

What is your favorite work of art to the MIA?
I generally fall in love with one of the recent acquisitions which comes from the studio of photography, such as the large chalk drawing on paper by Mequitta Ahuhja now suspended in the exhibition "until now".

What you currently observe for fun?
I am currently working through Madmen and Ang Lee film (just finished eating, drinking, male, female)

Where is your next trip?
I would like on field related to the collection of MIA photography with our curator of African Art, Jan-Lodewijk Grootaers similar to what we did for the Project of Miao Textiles in China.

Name a guilty pleasure.
Jockey off at the gym at noon. (Click here to see his skills impressive kung fu.)

What would be your power of super hero?
Search in any instrument and play as a virtuoso. I could save the world in this way.

Photo: Dan Dennehy

Planning of work-life series begins

Life Work Planning Center will begin his personal growth and professional development in New Ulm workshop.

Read more about Sleepy sent from Herald Eye

Speed skating: Davis, Rookard pave the way for the national event long track

Double Olympic champion Shani Davis won the 500 metres and 5,000 metres Thursday on the same track in Kearns where… racing

Read more on the Deseret News

Highlights of TV for Sun, January 2

TV highlights for Sunday, January 2.

Read more about thewest.com.au


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The art of the intended to create an end-of-life beautiful

For most of the life of his mother Tobi Kahn would present at each of its birthday. Gifts began during his childhood as a hand-drawn cards, offer more than the precocious. Increased it formally trained and then critically game artist, he played its/shredded tuna year, desk set up different, warta photo exhibition of the Museum.

Then early in the summer of 2004, Ellen Schapiro Kahn in Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center in Manhattan, dead at 75 pancreatic Cancer that had been found just one month before. It was uncertain may survive long enough even to be moved to the hospice near her home.

The woman is elegant taste and acute, Ms. Kahn has bedeviled by the smell of particular space. Something in its treatment of chemotherapy drugs, probably made at smell intolerably heavy. She always was adored flowers and his son, that its bouquets, but now it may not include them.

So Tobi Kahn gathered in one now final, a collection of his paintings of flowers, chryzantem fan rise and buttercups curling overlapping lines with white, blue, green, muted as pastels. Hung them in the hospital room, around its deathbed, what would be, so that the importance of memory can fill its nozdrzy from Ambrosia.

"Why not until the end of the life is beautiful?" Mr. Kahn, 58, as recalled in an interview at his studio on Long Island. "People say, the wedding should be beautiful, your birth should be beautiful. Why not user death? You cannot go for long in the Himalayas, you cannot dine sophisticated. However, you can view on the beautiful art. ”

With this private, personal view of his mother, Mr Kahn built a work unit, which seeks to solace, comfort, a kind of Sublimity, until the end of life. Is not only or even the basic work of doing — for decades was the protean, prolific artist paints, sculptures and installations--and yet it has become a special characteristic.

This artwork is withdrawn from the stage also expresses Mr Kahn, both its observance of the religious life Orthodox Judaism and its commitment to outreach throughout the line ". And at the same time, his choice for a group show at the Guggenheim in 1985 year of its reputation, his work has also been exhibited in places such as the Museum of Biblical art in New York and the Museum of religious art, contemporary art in St. Louis.

"One of the common bond of traditions is the concern of the people from suffering, love, mortality, immortality," said Dempsey e. Terrence Rev., Director of the Museum of St. Louis. "The role of religious art at the end of life is that it helps us to focus on what is very important — internal treatment, even if there is no physical healing and finally a sense of gratitude."

Already frozen art hospices, hospitals and Memorial chapels, of art from a single workspace to the entire room for meditation, Mr Kahn has several significant commissions in the near future. The Alliance for education, social services centre on the Lower East Side, he has to create the Memorial 10th anniversary for the victims of the terrorist attacks of 11 Sept 2001. The Healthcare Chaplaincy chose it as the main artist for palliative care units built 120-in lower Manhattan.

"Spiritual is equally important at the end of the road at the beginning," says Smith j. Walter Rev., President and Executive Director of chaplaincy. "The body and mind with naturally attacked by disease or aging independently, the soul is the thing which you can store the total person".

If Mr Kahn art can actually stir the soul, there is nothing about the process easily dried. As a child survivors of the Holocaust, named Uncle murdered by the Nazis at the age of 23 he grew up in Washington Heights among Jews emigres from Germany with an acute awareness of mortality in its most gruesome.

During his 20s, Mr Kahn was a girl, who was a disaster with cancer, and he credited his anguish into a series of portraits of unequal, clear, "says from the perspective of the time, reflects not only his Lover by suffering during chemotherapy, but also the Holocaust images from captives haggard, shaven-headed. In subsequent years Mr Kahn was designated to design many Holocaust memorials.

Yet he was imbued by his mother and grandmother from the life force, too, differently expressed by these women through fashion, career success, or an afternoon excursions to Museums of art. Also, as a member of the Jewish priestly caste with HaDintreisa Mr Kahn is prohibited by the law of religious to attend the funeral from anyone outside the immediate relative, travel it prove incompatible. Yes, only in the case of the death of his mother he actually occur ritual firsthand.

Which may help to clarify the transformation capabilities of its demise in its art. After the death of Mr Kahn began Ellen Kahn asking clergy members, Hospice staff and directors, what art death people wanted. Received both specific advice--no sharp edges, calmness, shades of blue, no drastic changes in tone, which can disable the hallucination--and more important, he recalls the wider recommendation on "some sense of dignity, no pill."

As part of its own process of grieving Mr Kahn spent 11 projects art memory of his mother. One of them involved in the design of the presbytery and meditation room and indoor residential premises Jewish 18 Hospice in the Bronx. Many of these paintings presented Lakes, horizons and landscapes, topics, to which Mr Kahn returned often in his art of life.

With their respect for nature, these paintings are strain of pantheism, one you can track how Kahn rear youthful fascination with Stonehenge. Work, but also subscribe to at least loosely Judaic concept "Mitzvah hiddur," sanctifying something (birds, if it is a literal) by beautifying it.

"We will be from one place to another," Mr Kahn go place "and beauty should be visible until you do."

E-mail: sgf1@columbia.edu


First published on December 31, 2010 11: 50 pm

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2011年1月15日 星期六

Jo Yeates murder detective warns of women not to walk alone at night

Police hunting killer Jo Yeates yesterday evening warned women to avoid home walking alone in the dark.

And probe murder of entry the ninth day, a team of 70-strong police confessed: "I don't know who killed Jo."

The release comes after its owner, Chris Jefferies was released on the guarantee of the observance of the ing arrest on suspicion of murder.

In addition to the flat where She lived in Clifton, Bristol, Chief Superintendent Jon Stratford said: "you can understand why citizens have doubt about their safety. Jo by the killer is still there. ”

Reassuring locals was "signs of the murderer was prowling the streets of the serial", which the Stratford warned lone women not to walk home after dark.

Yesterday evening zabrano former schoolmaster Jefferies, 65, which appeared in the Saturday, remained unclear.

Shall be deemed to be, the person is staying in the place agreed with the police.

His friends are defended retired teacher of English. The neighbour Peter Stanley, 56, said: "Just because someone is a strange looking with wild hair does not mean they are guilty of murder."

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Researchers continue to search the House four storey where Jefferies lived on the floor above the Jo and boyfriend Greg Reardon. Results from DNA samples from Jo front doors is expected today.

Her body was found at Christmas road verge three miles from home. It was the lack of a week.

Jo emotional tribute to her family paid in weekends.

In the Declaration, the parents of David and Theresa said: "Jo downloaded from us. The method has only intensified our grief.

"Have a beautiful and talented young lady that was intended to fly high.

"His life has been stolen from her and she was stolen from us. We are certain that it will be caught Jo killer. "

Greg guy said: "Jo was beautiful women, beautiful in mind, body and soul."

Architect said, he would have had a very career as a landscape Architect, adding: "will always I love it."


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2011年1月14日 星期五

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Love yourself thin! Want to lose weight? The trick is to think you're beautiful, just like you are right now

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By Louise Atkinson
Last updated at 1:59 AM on 3rd January 2011

There’s nothing like the first week of the new year to start a diet and exercise regime, but if your motivation is ?disgust at the size of your waistband, you could be setting yourself up to fail.

Successful slimming, according to Lisa Jackson, is all about banishing ?negativity and concentrating on loving everything you possibly can about ?yourself — even the Christmas excess.

In her new book, Adore Yourself Slim, she sets out a sensible eating and ?exercise plan packed with clever tips to ensure weight loss is steady and ?effective.

Have self belief: Being positive about your personality and appearance will help you lose weight Have self belief: Being positive about your personality and appearance will help you lose weight

But the real twist that makes her plan promise to work where so many others fail, she insists, is her emphasis on ?getting ?yourself in the right frame of mind before you start.

Here, she explains how you can:

PRE-DIET PREPARTION

Before you start on any diet, make sure you feel really good about yourself. If you don’t adore yourself for the ?person you are before you lose weight, you’re not going to be able to do so when you’re slim.

So sit down and write a list of the ten things you most love about yourself — whether it’s the way you laugh, your ?generous nature or the way you always say ‘Thank you’ when you get off a bus.

Now write down ten things other ?people adore about you — all the things your friends, family and colleagues might have mentioned (feel free to prompt them). Do they think you’re loyal? A sassy dresser? Witty? A good cook?.

This should give you a boost. Keep these lists safe and bring them out if a ‘What’s the point?’ day should strike.

ADORE YOUR BODY

When you’re slimming it’s easy to get fixated on the body parts you dislike, rather than making time to appreciate those for which you should be grateful. But for any diet to work, you need to fall in love with your body — the one you’ve got right now — before you start.

Simply take a good look at your body and write down a description of the bits you love (such as: ‘I love my hair, because it’s glossy’). Now, as you move through your weight loss plan, ?whenever you feel discouraged, take out this list and remind yourself of ?everything you love about your body.

Your mind is like a DVD player and you can choose which disc to play. If you find yourself watching a DVD that depicts your frustration, your list should help you chose a different one.

Perfect fit: A weightloss goal might be to fit into a smaller jean size than you normally wear Perfect fit: A weightloss goal might be to fit into a smaller jean size than you normally wear

SET YOUR SLIMMING GOALS

Find a quiet place where you are unlikely to be disturbed and make ?yourself ?comfortable. Relax.

Now focus all your attention on the ?reasons why you want to lose weight. Think about how you’ll feel when you’re slimmer, what you’ll look like, what outfits you’ll wear and the activities you’ll be ?participating in.

Draw up a list of your short-term goals (to buy gorgeous new clothes for the summer, for example), medium-term goals (to look better at 40 than you did at 25) and the lifelong ?reasons why you’d like to be slimmer and healthier (to look good and feel great).

Now that you know why you want to be slim, choose the rewards that will help spur you on to achieving those goals:

Promise yourself daily treats for sticking to the program (an invigorating body scrub, fake tan or pedicure).Promise yourself weight-loss rewards for every time there’s a drop on the scales (a massage, facial, new ?lipstick or new outfit — in a smaller size).Promise yourself something spectacular when you reach your target weight.

BOOST YOUR SELF BELIEF

The road to weight loss has its ups and downs, but you’ll sail through if you can keep your self-belief high. Super-charge it before you start by incorporating the following tricks into your life:

Spend the first precious minute of every day ?praising yourself. That way, even if no one else does (though they will, once the weight starts falling off), it matters less.Stop striving to be perfect — you don’t have to do everything right in order to love yourself and for others to love you. Instead of berating yourself if things don’t go to plan (the chocolate biscuit that jumped into your mouth, the day without exercise), start ?practising a bit of unconditional self-acceptance.Get in touch with your body — show it how much you adore it (rolls and all) by lavishing it with care and attention. Treat yourself to a scented body lotion and massage it in after a shower as a way of saying thank you for what your body does (carries you around, allows you to enjoy all the ?wonderful things life has to offer), not just for the way it looks.Banish evil thoughts — most women are plagued by a negative inner voice, ?belittling, sneering and criticising ?everything they do. But every time you catch yourself ?thinking something ?unhelpful (such as ‘I’ll always be ?overweight’), just imagine a giant STOP sign in front of your face. Then ?consciously turn that thought into a positive (‘Every day in every way I’m becoming slimmer and fitter’).Act like a Girl Guide — it’s far easier to believe you are a good person if you behave like one, so start ?committing acts of kindness and get in the habit of doing a daily good deed.Be grateful — every time you brush your teeth at night think of three things you’re happy to be (funny, ?determined, enthusiastic), three things you’ve done well that day (not lost your temper with the children, cooked a healthy meal, made others feel good about themselves) and three things you’re grateful to have (your health, a loving partner, a comfy bed).Fake it to make it — think of the most confident and successful person you know and analyse how they dress, look and behave, and then start ?copying them.

What you really feel inside doesn’t count because what you’ll be telling the world is that you have ?self-belief.

And guess what? With nothing better to go on than what you tell them, other people will soon start treating you like a person who’s confident and successful, which will boost your real confidence.

GETTING STARTED

Sticking to a diet and an exercise regime is never easy so, whichever route you use, stick to the ten Adore Yourself Slim commandments:

ONLY EAT FOOD YOU ADORE

You may not be able to eat whatever you like all the time, but dieting will never work if you force yourself to eat food you hate.

PUT YOURSELF FIRST

Nothing is more important than ?eating well and exercising, as if you don’t have good health you can’t make the most of everything life has to offer — or be there for the people who need you. Ask yourself daily ‘What do I need to do to stay on track?’ and make that your first priority.

EAT SLOWLY AND STOP WHEN FULL

People who eat quickly are twice as likely to be overweight — and eating slowly is a great way to give your body time to register that you’re full.

ASK WHAT YOU REALLY NEED

Every time you feel an urge to eat ?(outside of the three meals and two snacks per day) ask yourself this ?question — you may be surprised by the answer — do you really need food, or does your body need a break? A glass of water? A hug?

WATCH PORTION SIZES

Losing weight isn’t just about what you eat, but how much. And that counts for salad, too.

Instead of eating huge ?portions, eat smaller amounts and ?promise ?yourself you can have second helpings should this mini-meal not be enough. You will find yourself ?feeling ?pleasantly full on a lot less food.

HAPPY NEW REAR!

Eight out of ten women and seven out of ten men start a diet on New Year's Day

EVERY LITTLE HELPS

You didn’t become overweight in a day and you won’t slim down in one either. It took ?thousands of tiny ?lifestyle decisions to get where you are today and, by the same token, many tiny lifestyle ?decisions are going to help you slim.

Think about every bite of food you take, every move you make and, little by little, those calories you shave off and those extra bits of energy ?expenditure will add up to a new slim you.

REMEMBER YOUR GOAL

Psychologists have found that focusing on things rather than just appearance will make you more likely to be successful in your slimming quest. So make sure your diet goals are ?enticing and worthwhile.

FORGIVE AND FORGET

Don’t punish that one biscuit ?indulgence by feeling a failure for the rest of the week — that’s a certain way to sabotage your weight loss. Instead, forgive yourself and get back on track.

PLAN EVERYTHING

If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Go shopping for the week’s salad and ?vegetables on a Monday to reduce the risk of the empty fridge sending you off track.

Put your exercise sessions in your diary and fit other commitments around them, not the other way around.

RELAX

Studies show stress can make you fat, but rest, sleep and exercise can ease stress and help shift those pounds.

Extracted from Adore Yourself Slim by Lisa Jackson, published by Simon & Schuster on Thursday at ?12.99. ? Lisa Jackson 2011. To order a copy (P&P free), tel: 0845 155 0720.


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2011年1月13日 星期四

FanHouse: Gordon, laws, among the most improved

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Talent is one thing. Work ethic is another.

It's a creed that is as true in the NBA as anywhere else, and the Most Improved Player award is often the place to find a young player who has applied both key elements in a most admirable way while becoming a far more relevant member of the league.

Unless you're Bobby Simmons.

Leave it to a Clipper to mess with a good trend. The 2004-05 MIP award winner has fallen completely off the NBA map since he more than doubled his scoring average from one year to the next (7.8 points per game in 2003-04 to 16.4). Yet aside from that aberration, it's a quality cast of characters that has earned this trophy.

There's no shortage of worthy candidates in this year's race, too, including one who has a chance to right the Simmons wrong. Clippers guard Eric Gordon has seen a Simmons-like spike in his already-impressive production, going from 16.9 points per game and 44.9 percent shooting in his second season to 23.8 points per game on 46 percent shooting while proving a worthy running mate to Rookie of the Year leader Blake Griffin.

With only occasional exceptions, winning the NBA's Most Improved Player of the Year award has signaled the start of a productive career. Winners from the previous 10 years:

2009-10: Aaron Brooks, Rockets
2008-09: Danny Granger, Pacers
2007-08: Hedo Turkoglu, Magic
2006-07: Monta Ellis, Warriors
2005-06: Boris Diaw, Suns
2004-05: Bobby Simmons, Clippers
2003-04: Zach Randolph, Blazers
2002-03: Gilbert Arenas, Warriors
2001-02: Jermaine O'Neal, Pacers
2000-01: Tracy McGrady, Magic

Complete list of previous winners

Gordon was asked to do more when Baron Davis missed 14 games early on, and those demands haven't lightened even with veteran point guard returning on Dec. 1 and the Clippers' play improving of late. He is the latest young player to reap the benefits on international competition as well, having shined with Team USA during its gold medal run in the FIBA World Championship Tournament last summer.

And from the sound of it, Gordon would vote for himself if given the chance.

"I've improved a lot," he told me recently. "I think I've improved in almost every area, from assists (three per game in 2009-10 to 4.6 this season) to rebounding (2.6 to 3.3) to scoring. I know I've gotten a lot better this year and will hopefully get better for many years on.

"That (production level) is where I think I'm going to be from here on out. It's just easy for me to score now. I can contribute (in other areas) and still get those types of points."

The increase in numbers, it should be noted, has come while his playing time has been similar to last season (an increase from 36 minutes per game to 37.7). And while his 3-point percentage has dropped significantly (37.1 to 32.7), the impact is marginal because the three-ball is no longer such huge part of his game. While 3-point attempts accounted for 38.4 percent of Gordon's shots last season, they are making up just 29.7 percent of his attempts this time around.

Griffin, who steals the spotlight from Gordon and so many others around the league on a nightly basis, agrees that Gordon shouldn't be overlooked.

"I think his confidence is the biggest difference (this season)," Griffin said. "I saw him do all the things he's doing now last year, just not as much. We had a few more scorers last year, were a different team and all that. And he was a younger guy.

"But now he's kind of like a vet on this team and his confidence is unbelievable. His game is air-tight, in my opinion. He can go to the hole, shoot the three, shoot the mid-range (shot). He does everything."

He's not alone in this competition, though. Let's look at the others. (Stats comparing last season to this season updated through Friday's games; click the player's name to see his full stat-line)

1. Kevin Love, F, Minnesota

Key stats: Minutes per game (28:36 last season to 36 this season), Points (14 to 20.8), FG % (45.1 to 45.1), Rebounds (11 to 15.5)

Breakdown: Griffin might be in a class all his own when it comes to above-the-rim highlights, but Love is all by himself when it comes to everything under the iron. His third season has been a rare delight to watch unfold for one major reason: he's producing at the same rate as before despite seeing much more playing time. That's usually not the case, as most players' per-48 minute statistics fall off as they spend more time off the bench.

Thus, we have this eye-popping stat: Love already has five 20-20 games (points and rebounds), which includes his 31-point, 31-rebound game in a win over New York on Nov. 12. He has come within one rebound of that mark two other times. The 8-25 T-Wolves still have a long ways to go, but Love is making them worth watching every time out.

There's a trend developing here, too: Love, like Gordon, used his Team USA experience to help develop his game last summer.

2. Derrick Rose, PG, Chicago

Key stats: Points per game (20.8 to 23.9), Assists (6 to 8.5), 3-point FG % (26.7 to 39.1)

Breakdown: There are no rules saying an MVP candidate can't be up for MIP as well, and so we present one of the league's most thrilling young talents (who, by the way, was also a Team USA member).

He had already turned heads around the league in his first two seasons, showcasing his incredible speed, attack-mode style and leaping ability. But now he's taking it to a new level, having carried an offensive load like none other while waiting for Carlos Boozer to return from a hand injury and now leading a team that has won 12 of its last 14 games.

Perhaps most impressive of all is the fact that he did it while showing off a long-range game that is not only far more effective (see above comparison) but far more prevalent (0.8 3-point attempts per game last season compared to 4.3 this season).

3. Eric Gordon, G, Los Angeles Clippers

See above for the case for Gordon.

4. Michael Beasley, F, Minnesota

Key stats: Minutes per game (29:53 to 34:42), Points (14.8 to 22.2), FG % (45 to 47.6), 3-point percentage (27.5 to 43.9)

Breakdown: Yes, we know by now that Miami was willing to give up the second pick of the 2008 draft for just two future second-round draft picks because the Heat needed salary cap room to bring on LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, and Chris Bosh, but there's the other side of that reality too: They didn't think they were giving up much at all.

Beasley had underperformed badly in his first two seasons and been a public relations nightmare. Now, he's giving the T-Wolves someone else to watch beyond Love while, as general manger David Kahn told me in mid-November, being a true professional as well.

5. Russell Westbrook, PG, Oklahoma City

Key stats: Points per game (16.1 to 22.3), FG % (41.8 to 43.7), Free-throw percentage (78.8 to 87.1)

Breakdown: He is a point guard, after all, so we must first acknowledge the other area of importance beyond points, field-goal percentage and free throws. The score-first Westbrook is dishing it out just as frequently as before (eight assists per game last season compared to 8.1 this season), and the only noticeable area of decline -- by way of an increase -- is his turnovers (3.3 to 3.9).

But overall, Westbrook has taken significant steps forward that so many knowledgeable observers weren't sure were possible. Specifically, his mid-range game has come along and he is proving to be quite a leader. His improved accuracy from the charity stripe has come in handy, too, as he is getting to the line nearly three more times per game this season as compared to last (5.2 to 7.8).

On those rare nights when Kevin Durant is off, the Thunder are more confident than ever that they can rely on Westbrook to carry the offensive load. And, in case you weren't aware, Westbrook was a member of Team USA last summer as well.

6. Raymond Felton, PG, New York

Key stats: Points per game (12.1 to career-high 18), Assists (5.6 to career-high 8.9), FT % (76.3 to career-high 87.7)

Breakdown: Felton has certainly improved his production and deserves consideration at this point, but he is clearly benefiting from the system of coach Mike D'Antoni after years under the oppressive Larry Brown.

In fact, you have to wonder if Felton's outstanding play played a small role in Brown being pushed out in Charlotte on Dec. 22. Sources close to the Bobcats said owner Michael Jordan was frustrated at seeing Brown give up on players like Felton, who went on to greater prominence elsewhere (see Tyson Chandler).

Still, Felton has actually regressed in some key areas. His shooting percentage is down (a career-high 45.9 to 44.6), and his turnovers are up significantly (2.1 to 3.5 per game, ranking him sixth-worst in the league and fifth-worst among point guards).

7. Paul Millsap, PF, Utah

Key stats: Minutes per game (27:48 to 34:36), Points (11.6 to 17.5), Rebounds (6.8 to 7.9)

Breakdown: Not to bore folks with a math class here, but a key factor that separates some of these players from others when it comes to development is the ability to either maintain a previous productivity rate when given more playing time or perhaps even increase it.

In Millsap's case, the departure of free agent Carlos Boozer to Chicago has meant a 24.4 percent increase in playing time. His scoring, however, has increased 50.8 percent. And while his rebounding rate has actually declined, Millsap is clearly enjoying the chance to showcase the offensive game we all knew he had during his first four seasons with the Jazz.

8. Jrue Holiday, PG, Philadelphia

Key stats: Minutes per game (24:11 to 34:36) Points (eight to 14.3), Assists (3.8 to 6.5)

Breakdown: And the nomination for MIP candidate to watch closely goes to ...

As noted by first-year Sixers coach Doug Collins recently to FanHouse's Brett Pollakoff, "He's growing. He's 20 years old."

They were two relatively straightforward statements of fact, but also the main reasons to wonder how good Holiday can be after the UCLA product was taken 17th overall in 2009.

The intriguing part about his game is that he has the potential to become one of the league's best two-way point guards. His length is extremely bothersome on defense, and he has the necessary defensive mentality to flourish on that end.

Add in the development of his point guard skills offensively, and there is much promise here.

"He started out training camp ... trying to get guys so involved offensively that he struggled early," Collins said. "And then when I talked to him about looking more for his offense and being more aggressive with the pick and roll, it seemed to lift all of the other phases of his game. He has a chance to be a really good defender. He's long. He's rangy. When he gets his feet set, he can shoot the three. He's very good at going to the basket. He's got good body control."

And, of course, he's 20 and growing.

9. Roy Hibbert, C, Indiana

Key stats: Points per game (11.7 to 13.6), Rebounds (5.7 to 8.2), Blocks (1.6 to 1.9)

Breakdown: The numbers might not wow you, but the before and after pictures will. Hibbert transformed his body over the summer, losing 23 pounds through hard work and a little medical luck. Doctors discovered that the third-year player out of Georgetown had "athlete-induced asthma," a condition that would cause major fits with fatigue for Hibbert in recent years.

The 17th pick of the 2008 draft is a new man in many ways now, using his newly-chiseled body to bang more effectively with some of the best big men in the game and make us wonder if he could join that elite class one day soon. His offense took a serious dip last month, though, as his scoring fell from 15.6 points per game on 49.1 percent shooting in November to 10.9 on 41.6 percent shooting in December.

10. Dorell Wright, G/F, Golden State

Key stats: Minutes per game (20:48 to 38:53), Points (7.1 to 15.7), Rebounds (3.3 to 6.2), Assists (1.3 to 3.1)

Breakdown:
As Beasley well knows, there's something to be said for taking your talents away from South Beach. The seven-year veteran whose first six seasons came in Miami, signed a three-year, $11.4 million deal with the Warriors and has earned his keep quite well so far.

His three-point game has been a big part of Golden State's offense, as Wright is shooting an impressive 40.9 percent from beyond the arc while averaging nearly three times as many attempts (2.2 last season to six this season). He has buried six or more 3-pointers three times this season, including a career-high nine (on 12 attempts) in a win over Minnesota on Nov. 27. In fact, entering Saturday's action, he was tied with San Antonio's Manu Ginobili for the NBA's lead in 3-point makes.

Yet there is one serious hole in his MIP campaign, as Wright's overall efficiency from the field has taken a hit with his newfound playing time. His field-goal percentage has dropped from 46.3 to 41.6.

HONORABLE MENTION:

Wesley Matthews, G/F, Portland; D.J. Augustin, PG, Charlotte; JaVale McGee, C, Washington; Shannon Brown, G, Lakers; Daniel Gibson, G, Cleveland.

E-mail Sam at amick.sam@gmail.com or follow him on Twitter at @samickAOL.


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2011年1月12日 星期三

Monkey love

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By Lauren Slater ?|? March 21, 2004

OBEDIENCE. CONFORMITY. Cognitive. Cuing. These were the words used by psychologists in the 1950s, and Harry Harlow didn't like them. He wanted to talk about love. He was at a conference one day, and every time he used the word "love" another scientist would interrupt and say, "You must mean proximity, don't you?" until at last Harlow, a brash man who could also be strangely shy, said, "It may be that proximity is all you know of love -- I thank God I have not been so deprived."

That was just like him, to make such a statement, in public no less; he was prickly, impolite, a man who is remembered by some with real distaste and by others with fondness. But in 1959, Harlow was speaking science in a way no one had dared to before, injecting statistics with hemoglobin and heart, the Nabokov of psychology.

His experiments were long meditations on love, and all the ways we ruin it. In his research with wire monkeys, he was able to show that infant monkeys cared more for a soft surrogate mother that could not feed them than for a metal, milk-bearing one. Harlow's experiments, many captured on film, are chilling and underscore the power of proximity in our lives. From his findings a whole science of touch was born.

. . .

Little is known of Harlow's own childhood. He was born Harry Israel in 1905, to Lon and Mabel Israel of Fairfield County, Iowa. His father was a failed inventor. His mother, Harlow recollected in a partly finished autobiography, was not a warm woman.

Harlow experienced bouts of depression throughout his life; maybe here is where they began, in the long Midwestern winters. At school, he did not fit in. By age 10, he had begun to draw during every free minute he had, making a strange and beautiful land called Yazoo, populated with winged animals and horned beasts. When he was done with a picture, he would bisect the beasts with sharp black lines, so they lay on the page, all bloody color but still somehow beautiful, vivid and vivisected.

Harlow did his undergraduate and graduate work at Stanford, where he studied with Lewis Terman, the famous IQ researcher who was just then probing into gifted children. At the suggestion of Terman, he changed his Jewish-sounding name to Harlow. After he married one of Terman's former gifted children, Clara Mears, with her IQ of 155, Terman wrote a letter of congratulations that makes the match sound more like animal husbandry than human bonding: "I am happy to see the joining of Clara's extraordinary hereditary material with Harry's productivity as a psychologist."

When Harlow took a job at the University of Wisconsin-Madison in 1930, he planned to study rats, but he wound up with rhesus monkeys, a small agile breed. Ever Terman's student, he began by devising a test of monkey intelligence, a sort of simian IQ profile. But soon he began to wonder about something else.

Harlow would begin his experiments by separating the infant monkeys from their mothers and peers, and he noticed that the infants, when separated, became extremely attached to the terry cloth towels covering the cage floors. They would lie on them, grip them in their tiny fists, throw tantrums if they were taken away, just like a human infant with a ratty blanket or a stuffed bear. The monkeys loved these towels. Why?

This was a huge question. Attachment had previously been understood in terms of nutritive rewards: We love our mothers because we love their milk. Researchers Clark Hull and Kenneth Spence had said human attachment was predicated on drive reduction: Hunger is a primary drive and we want to reduce it; the same goes for thirst and sex. From the 1930s through the `50s, the theory of drive reduction and its link to love went unquestioned.

Harlow, however, began to question it. He fed the baby monkeys by hand, and when he took the little plastic bottles away, the infants just smacked their lips and maybe wiped a white dribble off their hairy chins. But when Harlow tried to take their towels away, the simians screamed like a slaughterhouse, throwing their small bodies down and clutching at bunches of cloth. This fascinated Harlow. As his biographer Deborah Blum wrote, the best way to understand the heart was to break it. And so started Harlow's brutal and beautiful career.

. . .

Rhesus macaque monkeys share roughly 94 percent of their genetic heritage with humans. But Harlow felt no kinship with his test subjects. "The only thing I care about is whether a monkey will turn out a property I can publish," he said. "I don't have any love for them. I never have. I don't really like animals. I despise cats. I hate dogs. How could you love monkeys?"

Harlow's experiment required wire cutters, cardboard cones, hot coils, steel nails, and soft cloth. He used the wire cutters to fashion a wire mother, its torso patterned with small squares, a single inflexible breast "on the ventral front." Affixed to this breast, a steel nipple pierced with a tiny hole through which the monkey milk could flow.

Then Harlow fashioned a soft surrogate, a cardboard cone bunted in a terry cloth towel. He wrote, "The result was a mother, soft, warm, and tender, a mother with infinite patience, a mother available 24 hours a day . . .. It is our opinion that we engineered a very superior monkey mother, although this position is not held universally by monkey fathers."

First Harlow took a group of newborn rhesus macaque babies and put them in a cage with the two surrogate mothers: the wire mother full of food, the cloth mother with an empty breast and a sweet smile. After the initial trauma, something amazing started to happen. Within days, the baby macaques transferred their affections from the real mother, who was no longer available, to the cloth surrogate.

The cloth mother, however, had no milk, so when the youngsters were hungry, they would dart over to the chicken-wire mother and then run back to the safety of the soft towel. Harlow graphed the mean amount of time the monkeys spent nursing versus cuddling. The disparity in favor of cuddling, he wrote, was "so great as to suggest that the primary function of nursing . . . is that of insuring frequent and intimate body contact of the infant with the mother."

Harlow was establishing that love grows from touch, not taste, which is why, when the mother's milk dries up, the child continues to love her. The child then takes this love, the memory of it, and recasts it outward, so that every interaction is a replay and a revision of this early touch. "Certainly," writes Harlow, "man cannot live by milk alone."

This was a significant discovery. The `30s to the `50s had been a cold era in childrearing. The famous pediatrician Dr. Benjamin Spock advised feeding by schedule. Nestl and Ross laboratories discovered formula, white powder, plastic nipples, tepid water from the faucet. John Watson famously wrote, in his books about how to rear children, "Do not overindulge them. Do not kiss them goodnight. Rather, give a brief bow and shake their hand before turning off the light."

Well, Harlow said you should never shake a baby's hand. You should not hesitate to hold him. What's more, he said, any old palm will do: "Love for the real mother and love for the surrogate mother appear to be very similar. . .." Harlow and company had identified "contact comfort" as an essential component of love. But what else was there?

Surely, Harlow hypothesized, the face is another variable of love. The original surrogates had primitive faces with black bicycle reflectors for eyes. Now Harlow ordered his lab assistant to make a really good monkey mask, to see what sort of attachment it would produce. However, the experimental monkey was born before the face was finished, so Harlow dropped the newborn in the cage with its terry cloth mother, who had only a blank, featureless flatland for a face. The little monkey loved the faceless mother, kissing it, nibbling it. When the ornamental monkey mask was finally attached, the baby screamed in horror, rushed to a corner of its cage, rocked violently.

Many have called Harlow's experiments cruel. But there is also something powerful and affirmative about what he gave us: the sure knowledge that our needs are more complex than simple hunger, that we seek to connect at all costs, and will always find the first face the loveliest face.

. . .

Harlow was studying love even as he himself had already fallen out of love. Clara had left with her two children, but Harlow had another woman, the Iron Maiden. The Iron Maiden was a special surrogate monkey mother Harlow had designed; she shot out sharp spikes and blasted her babies with air so cold and forceful the infant monkeys were thrown back against the bars of their cages, clinging and screaming. This, claimed Harlow, was an evil mother, and he wanted to see what would happen.

Here is where Harlow began to earn his darker reputation. Here is where he stepped from science into fairy tales. He made many of the iron maidens: Some rattled their children and stabbed them. No matter what the torture, Harlow observed, the babies would not let go. There is no partial reinforcement to explain this behavior; there is only the dark side of touch, the reality of primate relationships, which is that mothers can kill us even as they hold us.

In 1958, as the newly elected president of the American Psychological Association, Harlow traveled to the group's annual meeting in Washington, D.C., to deliver a speech called "The Nature of Love." He interspersed his speech with powerful black-and-white film clips of the sci-fi-looking surrogates and the babies who depended on them. At the end, he spoke of the "practical applications" of his research.

American women, he said, were threatening to displace men in the workplace and the university. However, he declared, there was some good news. "It is cheering in view of this trend to realize that the American male is physically endowed with all the really essential equipment to compete with the American female on equal terms in one essential activity: the rearing of infants . . .."

Soon after that speech, the University of Wisconsin at Madison issued a press release announcing "Motherhood Obsolete." Harlow put out new research effectively showing that a cloth surrogate mother was more important than a nursing mother and could stand in just as well as the real mother. Harlow appeared on "To Tell the Truth," and CBS made a documentary of his work.

But something was not going well. When he took the grown-up cloth-mothered monkeys out to play and mate, they were violently antisocial. Some began to display autistic-like behavior. A New York Times reporter came out to Madison to do a follow-up and Harlow led him to his lab, where a troop of rocking, head-banging macaques sat in cages, chewing off their fingers. "I admit it," said Harlow. "I have made a mistake."

And so he set out to correct it. Mothering, he hypothesized, must have other variables, such as motion. So he made a surrogate that could rock.

According to Leonard Rosenblum, one of Harlow's students at the time and now a renowned monkey researcher in his own right, this produced babies that were almost normal, as long as they got an hour and a half of daily play with a live monkey as well. Rosenblum says, "What this means is that there are three variables to love -- touch, motion, and play -- and if you can supply all of those, you are meeting a primate's needs."

Rosenblum goes on to repeat that with a half-hour a day of play "the kids" would be perfectly fine. "It's amazing," he says, "it's amazing how little our nervous system needs in order to turn out normal."

In some respects this is encouraging. A little jiggle, a soft sweater, and only 30 minutes of actual primate interaction. Any mother can do this: lazy, working, wired, iron. But if Harlow's findings are seemingly so reassuring, so all about love, why do they lodge in the gut like one of his experimental spikes?

We shiver through Harlow's results, but still we make use of them. His published, powerful research made its way into baby-care products -- most notably the sling and the Snugli, which have added warmth to the ways we parent infants. William Sears, the famous attachment-parenting advocate, a pediatrician who preaches sleeping with your babies, keeping them close at all times, is a Harlow-made man, whether he knows it or not.

Orphanages, social service agencies, the birthing industry all had critical policies altered based in part on Harlow's findings. Thanks in part to Harlow, doctors now know to place a newborn directly on its mother's belly after birth. Also thanks in part to Harlow, workers in orphanages know it's not enough to prop a bottle; the foundling must be held and rocked, see and smile. Thanks to Harlow and his colleagues in the study of attachment, we have been humanized -- we possess an entire science of touch, and some of this came from cruelty. There's the paradox.

. . .

Thanks to Harlow, we also have the animal rights movement, which was inspired in part by his research. Until a few years ago, the Animal Liberation Front had a demonstration at the University of Wisconsin's National Primate Research Center, where they mourned in the presence of thousands of stuffed Kmart monkeys.

Some say Harlow's words caused the trouble. "The problem with Harlow," says Rosenblum, "is the way he described things. He did it to get a rise out of people . . .. He would never say `terminated.' He would say `killed.' Why couldn't he have called the `rape rack"' -- Harlow's term for the contraption he devised to force his disturbed female monkeys to mate -- "a restraining device? If he had, he wouldn't have such a mixed reputation today."

But it's not just the words that are disturbing. I am disturbed by a cuff strangling a monkey's neck. I am disturbed by the Iron Maiden, the rape rack, despite the knowledge they gave us -- and Harlow, perhaps he was disturbed as well. For all his pronouncements about how he didn't care for his monkeys and didn't like animals, some of his students suggest that the nature of his work began to really bother him.

In 1971 Harlow's second wife, Peggy, died of breast cancer. Around that time, he went off to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota, where he submitted to a series of electroshock treatments, himself now the animal strapped down on the table.

Back in Madison, people said he was never the same again. He no longer wanted to study maternal deprivation. The 1960s saw the rise of biological psychiatry and the hope that medications might alleviate mental conditions. That interested Harlow. Once again, he turned to his rhesus macaques.

He built a black isolation chamber in which an animal was hung upside down for up to two years, unable to move or see the world, fed through a grid at the bottom of the V-shaped device. This Harlow called "the well of despair." Indeed, it was successful in creating a primate model of mental illness. The animals, once removed, after months or years, were shattered and psychotic. Nothing Harlow did could bring them back. There appeared to be no cure. No way to contact, to comfort.

In the end, Harlow died of Parkinson's disease. He could not stop shaking.

Copyright 2004 by Lauren Slater. With permission of the publisher, W.W. Norton & Company, Inc.

Lauren Slater is a psychologist living in Somerville. This article is adapted from her new book, "Opening Skinner's Box: Great Psychological Experiments of the Twentieth Century" (Norton), which discusses Stanley Milgram's obedience studies, B.F. Skinner's research in behaviorism, and eight other experiments.

c Copyright 2006 Globe Newspaper Company.

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